My husband's interview in France in very soon.
Today we are waiting for the final confirmation of his itinerary and will then immediately make mine. This weekend we went ahead and booked hotels in Nice and Antibes, and we roughly planned the areas we want to check out as possible places to rent a villa for the first year.
It is all so exciting and dynamic! The south of France with its fabled beaches, ancient history, fine foods & even finer scenery is beckoning and more than that - it's within our grasp. Up till now we've been in a bit of a giddy fog about the whole thing but I've got to be honest and admit that in the last couple of days a creeping terror is darkening my heart.
So many 'what ifs'
What if we can't speak the language well enough to even feed ourselves?
What if our daughter is miserable there?
What if we've built this up in our minds so much that we can't help but be disappointed?
What if we unwittingly choose an apartment in the worst part of town?
What if we go broke?
What if I can't find a place to let my dog do his dog thing?
What if I am bored out of my mind, being that I'll not be able to work?
What if the locals never, ever accept us?
What if ... well, the list goes on.
I know these doubts are temporary and that the trip in a couple of weeks will help answer a handful of the important questions. And I am prone to wild fluctuations of emotion, after all. It could be that I'm just boarding the usual rollercoaster and my fears are not truly related to our new adventure at all. I mean I did lie in bed the other night worrying that I'd somehow let my father die because I was ill-equipped to help him through his battle with cancer from 300 kilometers away. (this is a favourite self-imposed guilt trip of mine.)
*sigh*
It's going to be great. It's going to be life - only warmer and with fewer preservatives. :)
Right?
1 comment:
But, what if you don't do this, a dream you've had, and years from now you really begin to regret you hadn't taken the chance? You took the chance on quitting your job too. Just think of what you'll be exposed to over there and how it might inspire you. Oh, as to the dog thing, the French love dogs and they're allowed in restaurants from what i've read.
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